Yesterday I had the opportunity to watch the movie October Baby directed by Andrew and Jon Erwin. It is the story of a 19 year old girl who just learns she is adopted- after a failed abortion- who then is uncertain what that means about who she is. (Somewhat based on life of Gianna Jessen) She goes on a road trip to try and find her birth mother and look for answers but ends up finding out more than she wants to know. The biggest lesson I took home from the movie is how destructive secrets can be, to everyone involved.
Adoptive mom and dad kept Hannah’s adoption a secret from her. She must have wondered, ‘if it wasn’t a bad thing then why wouldn’t they have mentioned it sooner?’ As an adoptive parent, my daughter heard the word ‘adopted’ often enough that it didn’t bother her. It would occasionally come up in the words I spoke to her such as, “I’m so glad the Lord allowed us to adopt you.” But it was when she was maybe 4ish and she reached over to put her hand on my belly saying, “I comed from here,” and I told her she came from another woman’s tummy that she first started understanding what adoption meant.
Even after Hannah’s parents told her about being adopted, they didn’t tell her some other important information involved in her birth, so when she found out, she was hurt again. Enter in a nurse who kept secrets at her job that eventually led to her leaving the profession. Then Hannah found her birthmom who kept the birth a secret from her newer husband. More secrets causing pain. Why is it we think it will be less painful to hide the bad/ difficult/ painful/ humiliating/ ‘awful’ things in life? All it does is keep us in bondage and Jesus came to set us free.
The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he hath anointed me to preach the gospel to the poor; he hath sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to preach deliverance to the captives, and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty them that are bruised, Lk. 4:18
There is a reason Jesus came- for our salvation. Ultimately it is our complete deliverance He desires, not just salvation from hell. God wants us to be whole*, which logically assumes free of sin, sickness and disease, mental health problems, oppression, and bondage. Let me expound on some of this scripture using Strong’s:
- to heal the brokenhearted (to cure, make whole those who are shattered or completely crushed in their heart (feelings and/ or thoughts))
- to preach deliverance to the captives (to proclaim freedom (deliverance, forgiveness, liberty) to the prisoners of war/ captives)
- to set at liberty them that are bruised (crushed)
From experience, I have learned that keeping our ‘yucky’ parts or past a secret is used by the devil to oppress us with guilt, condemnation, shame, fear, self-loathing etc. After all, he comes to steal, kill and destroy, but Jesus came to give us superabundant (in quantity and quality- Strong's) life:
The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly. Jh. 10:10
And secrets tend to come out sooner or later, so why not deal with them as soon as possible. When we share our burdens the load on us is lightened (Gal. 6:2) and we can continue on our journey much relieved. Yes, we are to cast our burden on the Lord (Ps. 55:22) and we should do this always, but He also put people- family, friends, and fellow believers, in our lives to help us with the tough stuff. “Confess (acknowledge) your faults (slip, unintentional error, willful transgression, fall, offence, sin) one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed.” (Jms. 5:16)
Healing ultimately comes through Jesus, but He often uses people in His endeavor. Consider confiding your burdens (or secrets) in someone you trust today, and see what God will do in your life.
…that you may be healed!
* Mt. 9:22 ; 15:28 ; Mk. 6:5; Lk. 8:50; Jh. 5:4,6,9