Right now I do. Ten minutes ago I realized I missed meeting
up with one of my newer friends. We
haven’t been able to see each other for a few months due to her work and I go
and miss the first opportunity to see her.
And I really wanted to spend time with her. I’d be easier to type this if I could stop
crying. (Yep, I cry pretty easily.) Her forgiveness won’t make it any easier to
face her again. In fact, I dread the
next conversation…
It’s not that I really hate myself, but
my failings. I forget things, especially
short term memory things. Last week I
forgot to pick up my son from his bus stop after school- I’ve only been doing
it for four years. The scary part is he
didn’t even cross my mind. So today I
forgot my much anticipated coffee date with my friend that we just arranged
yesterday! Why, oh why, oh why does it
have to be this way?
In case you wonder, I’ve been to the
doctor and even a specialist, and they can’t find anything wrong. That actually makes this worse because there
seems to be no reason. It just makes me
feel stupid. Overall, not a good place
to be. That’s why I’m keeping this short
and giving out some Scriptures that hold me together at times like this:
Blessed be
God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and the
God of all comfort, He comforting us in all our trouble… 2Cr. 1:3,4
The LORD is near to the brokenhearted and saves the
crushed in spirit. Ps. 34:18
When you pass
through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers,
they shall not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you shall not be
burned; nor shall the flame kindle on you. Is. 43:2
My soul, be silent only to God; for my hope is from Him. He only is
my rock and my salvation; He is my
strong tower; I shall not be shaken. In God is
my salvation and my glory; the rock of my strength; my hiding-place is in God. Ps. 62:5-7
And God shall wipe
away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither
sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things
are passed away. Rv. 21:4 KJV (I hope earthly embarrassments also pass away…)
One prayer: Lord, use ALL my failings however You can for
Your glory