I don’t think I’ve ever been an overly anxious person, but today I figured out there is something I get a little anxious about every time. It involves clicking the button. Most often it is the send button when I am composing an email, and when I hesitated for the 8th time this morning only to reread the text again, it dawned on me, this is what I often do.
So the first thing I did is question if this is perfectionist issues rising up again and decided it was not. With emails it is more of a concern that I stated what I needed to clearly for others to understand and a concern that I might be misunderstood based on how I said something. How weird is that? I wonder if there are others who think this way…
Still, when I consider my past, I remember other times I couldn’t click the button. This one time I had gone online to buy a computer and I had chosen everything we wanted in it, was on the page where I could see the total cost and inputted my payment card numbers, and then I couldn’t do it. As much as I knew we needed it, we could afford it, and with all the research I’d done to make sure it was what we needed, I placed the cursor over the purchase button and stopped. Though I felt like an idiot, I couldn’t make myself press the button; my hubby had to come do it for me!
Do not fear; for I am with you; be not dismayed; for I am your God. I will make you strong; yes, I will help you; yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of My righteousness. Is. 41:10
I sought Jehovah, and He heard me, and delivered me from all my fears. Ps. 34:4
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God which passes all understanding shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Php. 4:6-7
So now I’m thinking I need to start praying about the situation. Some people might think- oh, it’s just a little issue, why bother God with it, but the Lord did not give us a spirit of fear (2Tm. 1:7) and since His perfect love casts out fear (1Jh. 4:18), I’m sure He’d rather us trust Him in all of the little things in life, not just the big ones. Besides, when my young daughter used to go to her dad and tell him she needed help even in ‘little things’, he was always willing and happy to do it.
And the Scriptures above indicate He will make us strong when we are too weak to do what we need to do. If we seek Him and request for His help, He will give us the strength and peace we need to do the things we find tough- even if they seem so silly. So, I determine to stop rereading so many times. I will allow one reread, and then I will pray for God’s help and click send knowing that He will use all things for good somehow even if it is just using me to teach others patience!!! Now, if only I remember to pray…
(yep, I just need to remember...
I actually forgot to blog the past couple days until it was too late in the day- oops J)